Creating bonds with others

Today, we are going to discuss three important ideas that shape our communication and society. Politeness, Compliments and Institutional and Social power & Online Silencing. These may sound separate but actually, they are all connected to one main theme: how language and behavior influence relationships, respect and power in both real and online life.

Let’s start with Politeness and Compliment.

Politeness:

Politeness means showing respect through our words and actions. It’s not just saying “Please” and “thankyou” and being kind in how we talk.

For example:
Instead of saying “Give me your notes, we can politely say, “Could you please share your notes with me?”
That simple change makes our tone softer and more respectful.

Basic polite words:

• Please
• Thankyou
• Sorry
• Excuse me
• You are welcome
• May I…..?
• Could you…..?
• Would you….?

Polite requests:

• Could you please
• Would it be possible
• Do you mind if I….
• I would appreciate if I
• May I ask you for

Compliment:

Compliments are another form of Positive communication- A compliment is a small appreciation – like Saying “you did a great job” on completion of a project. Compliments make people feel valued and confident.

But they should always be sincere. A fake compliment can sound disrespectful. Genuine politeness and honest compliment help build trust and healthy communication -whether in school, home or workplace.

Now moving to our next concept “Institutional and social power.”

Institutional and social power:

Power exists in every society but it comes in different forms. Institutional power comes from official positions like teachers, Police, officers, Judges or managers. Their authority is linked to the institutions they represent.

General compliments:

• You look great today
• You have a wonderful smile
• You are so thoughtful
• I really admire your confidence
• You are incredibly talented.

Personality compliments:

• You are such a kind person.
• You have a wonderful smile.
• You make people feel comfortable.
• You are very understanding.
• Your positivity is contagious.

For example:
A principal has the power to make school decisions. Meanwhile, social power doesn’t come from a title, it comes from an influencer or respected elder in a community that holds social power. For instance, a social media influencer or a respected elder in the community holds social power because people listen to them.

So Institutional power maintains order, while social power shapes opinion and culture.

In society:

Like in gathering the ulamas speak a lot and they possess a respectful place and people also allow them to speak. Same like that we tend to hear our elders Grandma grandfathers in our houses.

Now discussing the last one modern issue. In today’s online and digital world, everyone has a voice, but sometimes that voice is attacked or silenced online.

Online silencing:

Online silencing happens when people face harassment, bullying or hate for expressing opinions e.g when a journalist or activist posts something and gets flooded with negative comments, discouraging them from speaking again.

It can also happen through canceled culture, where people are socially excluded or attacked online for their views. This limits free expression & creates fear. The effects are serious-people stop sharing ideas, creativity declines, and healthy debate disappears.

Dogpiling:

A large group floods someone with critical comments at once to overwhelm or intimidate them.

Example: Dozens of users replying with insults or sarcastic comments to make someone stop posting.

Banning or muting someone from posting:

Removing someone from a group or blocking them simply for expressing a different but respectful view.

Ridiculous and mocking:

“ This is the dumbest thing I have ever seen”
Posting memes or gifts meant to belittle instead of responding.

Prevention:

To prevent this we must promote digital politeness that shows the same respect online that we show in real life.

So to sum up, Politeness and compliment build respect, institutional and social power shape order and influence and online silencing reminds us to use our voices responsibly. Communication is a power – and with that power comes responsibility. If we use our words kindly and respectfully, we can make both the real and digital world a better place.